Every one, every week. Men come to a table each week when they’re voices are heard. Participation drives attendance. Some men may not initially open up about personal issues, questions on Scripture, or opinions on a topic. Use “ice breaker” questions that are lighthearted and casual to give every man the opportunity to talk. Other men at the table hearing from them gives the opportunity to build relationships and, over time, grow comfortable enough to engage in deeper conversation.

Encourage invitations. Encourage table members to cast out their social “nets” to draw other people to the Fellowship. “Come, follow Me,” Jesus said, “and I will make you fishers of men” (Matthew 4:19). All participants should feel free to invite anybody they would like (neighbors, clients, relatives, coworkers, friends, fellow church members, etc.) whether they are a Christ-follower or not. When inviting people, they should tell them about the table, starting and ending times, discussion format, and that they won’t be put on the spot (but will be introduced as a guest).

Contact table participants weekly. As the leader of your fellowship, make it a point to contact your table group weekly. You can facilitate this through a simple group text. Bonus points for a personal email or handwritten note to your table on occasion. The more personal you make the contact, the more you are modeling to them the value of the relationships.

Pray. Your daily time in prayer is crucial to the health of the fellowship. Visit leadmin.org/effectiveprayer for a simple, week-long introduction to prayer that may build up this important spiritual habit for your own leadership development.

Keep a reasonable group. Some men’s tables have grown to 20 or more people. We have found that large groups become less effective because not every man has the opportunity to speak at each meeting. Eight men at a table is ideal. Five is the minimum, and 10-12 is the maximum, in terms of effectiveness. A best practice when the table grows beyond a reasonable size is to approach the top communicator at the table about splitting off and leading a new table (see “Identify and develop…” below).

Be aware of drop-outs. Statistics reveal that a man who misses three table meetings and is not contacted will be unlikely to return. Additionally, it will take up to seven consistent times attending for a man to make weekly meetings a habit. A man’s first 8-10 weeks becomes crucial to building long-term engagement. A table leader’s most important leadership development task during the week is not preparing for their table discussion. Rather, it’s connecting personally with men, especially those who are absent. Ramp up contacts the more weeks a man misses—two weeks in a row, two contacts that next week, three weeks in a row, three contacts. Some men will drop out, but never let a drop out occur because a man was ignored.

Identify and develop table leaders. When your table has 10-12 regular attendees, it’s time to start another table. Look for a man who regularly attends and is a key participant in the table and approach him about launching a new table. More than one table can likely meet nearby at your same location, so men who form the new table will still see their friends from their original table. A potential table leader can receive this guide to help them know how to start and lead a table. And you’ll find additional instruction for starting and growing a table at leadmin.org/table.