5 Forks on the Road to Success
Are you pursuing success in life and work? What does that look like? Many leaders allow success for them to be defined by others, or by circumstances. If you just have enough money, enough toys, the right relationships, a place to get away from it all, a close family—then you will be successful. All of these things are wonderful in their own right, but do they quantify what it means to be a success?
Success in the dictionary the accomplishment of an aim or purpose—when you achieve what you desire. In that sense it could be a point at which something has occurred. That’s why we often say of the successful, “They’ve arrived.” But a real success is one that remains true and lasting for a long time. It’s not so much a point as it is a progression. It’s often been said that “the joy is in the journey.” Though we may repeat that phrase to ourselves, few really live with that idea as their worldview. We tend to put our goals in tangible terms—buy that house, have enough money for my kids’ education—than the intangible.
Real success is not in getting to some specific place, but rather throughout life, to have a sense that what you are doing, and who you are, means something important. In this sense, finding success in life is not about arriving, but how you engage along the way. Consider these forks in the road when thinking about what might make you successful:
Choose enjoyment over affluence. What good is all the wealth in the world if you aren’t able to have fun? Morgan Freeman playing god had a great line in the movie Bruce Almighty: “Some of the happiest people in the world go home smelling to high heaven at the end of the day.” Those happy people are real, working hard at low end jobs for scant wages, and lack the means to buy much beyond the basics. Yet they’ve learned to enjoy life through their experiences, relationships, faith, and other things that money won’t buy.
Success question: Is what I am pursuing for success creating opportunities for me to enjoy life, or has that pursuit consumed my life?
So I commend the enjoyment of life, because there is nothing better for a person under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany them in their toil all the days of the life God has given them under the sun. Ecclesiastes 8:15
Choose meaning over motive. You may choose a career, a relationship, a project because it helps you achieve something for yourself. Consider first though if that goal really means anything. Does it help people? Does it build up the community? Does it leave a positive impact for the next generation? In Hierarchy of Needs: A Theory of Human Motivation, psychologist Abraham Maslow shows that it is difficult if not impossible to live your most meaningful life if you have uncertainty about meeting your most basic needs. Recent happiness studies have found that in North America, your happiness and life satisfaction are diminished until you reach an income level of about $95,000 a year. But the studies also found that above that level, indices of happiness do not increase with greater income—and might even decline.[1] Working on something meaningful is future-looking, and often involves giving. Meaning can also be stressful and challenging. But pursuing something meaningful can also be deeply rewarding.
Success question: Is what I’m doing right now leading me to accomplish something I believe is truly important?
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Choose focus over distractions. So many hours of a leader’s life are spent on distractions. Social media, binge watching streaming series, online games, too many meetings and emails. There’s nothing wrong with communication and entertainment (indeed as already stated we should take time to enjoy life). But don’t allow these to take up so much time that they keep you from focusing on what is of great value. What’s fascinating about highly successful people in any field is that they are most often known for just one thing. The ability to hone in on the one thing is a difficult to master but tremendously rewarding in its execution.
Success question: What could I spend less time on today that would help me focus on something I value?
I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible. 1 Corinthians 7:35
Choose facts over fiction. Social media influencers spend hours creating a life online that doesn’t exist in real life. They shoot pictures at other people’s homes or in other people’s cars or at other people’s parties and imply that this is the life they’re living. It’s all an effort to impress people that they honestly don’t know. Are you pursuing an image of a life you’d like to have, versus living in the reality of who you are right now? The lie is that you can somehow manifest that success by trying it on or Photoshopping your face into it. The truth is that in doing so, you’ll miss out on opportunities to grow important relationships and connect with real people in the process.
Success question: Am I spending time creating a fictional image of my life for others, or am I growing authentic and meaningful relationships with people in-person, versus online?
Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15
Choose knowledge over results. On the way to success, you’ll encounter setbacks. A business that didn’t work out, an unexpected health scare, an aging parent that needs your time and resources. The temptation is to distance yourself from anything that doesn’t immediately lead you closer to your goals. But wise leaders look at each setback as an opportunity to learn, acquiring experience that will help them in the future. Read any major success story and in the narrative will be a chapter on “what I learned from…”. Look at these speed bumps not as departures from success, but rather as essential to it.
Success question: What am I learning from setbacks and failures that I can apply to my life and goals moving forward?
An intelligent heart acquires knowledge, and the ear of the wise seeks knowledge. Proverbs 18:15
[1] https://www.forbes.com/sites/dennisjaffe/2018/09/14/getting-over-happiness-why-meaningfulness-is-a-better-life-purpose/
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